For 100 Days, I Illustrated People In Exchange For Their Secrets

I’m Terence Eduarte and I’m an illustrator from the Philippines. Every person has an interesting story to tell and I wanted to channel that into this project. I gathered a lot of silly secrets from friends and unexpected confessions from strangers around the world.

Here are some of them.

More info: Instagram | trnz.co

“I’m acting in a play where this guy has to act like he’s secretly in love with me. But when the play ends, we go back to real life where I’m secretly in love with him.”

“I sometimes feel alone even if I’m with friends. I feel like I’m just an add-on when we’re together.”

“I want to ask my half-sister if our estranged dad ever touched her back when they were living under the same roof. Or was I his only victim?”

Image credits: www.instagram.com

“I always check if my friends are doing well, but people rarely ask how I am.”

Image credits: www.instagram.com

“Half of my friends are people I wish I never met.”

Image credits: www.instagram.com

“I created an imaginary friend as a coping mechanism for my depression. Now I want to make her disappear but she keeps coming back.”

Image credits: www.instagram.com

“I told my unborn son I wasn’t ready to be loved by him. The next day I miscarried.”

Image credits: www.instagram.com

“It was my 28th birthday last week and no one remembered it. Not a single call or text from my friends and family. So I woke up the next day, sat outside my house and cried quietly. My dog came and started crying too. It was the most beautiful thing someone has ever done for me.”

Image credits: www.instagram.com

“I like playing with other people’s feelings because i’m unsure about mine.”

Image credits: www.instagram.com

“I’ve cheated on quite a few guys. And now that I’ve found the love of my life, he wasn’t ready for me. He was seeing me while he was seeing his ex. If there’s any way to portray Karma in its purest, most painful and justified form, this is it.”

Image credits: www.instagram.com

“I burned the suicide note I wrote a month ago. Today is a good day.”

Image credits: www.instagram.com

“I wrote letters to my girlfriend everyday. Everyday until her lung cancer took her away from me.”

Image credits: www.instagram.com

“I got drugged and raped by someone i knew and can’t get myself to tell anyone for fear of victim blaming. But on most days, i can’t help but victim blame myself.”

“Half of my friends are people I wish I never met.”

“I don’t like my close friends being close with other people.”

“I have a weird obsession with smelling the scent of paper and hearing the sound while flipping through the pages.”

“I can’t stand the ringing of bells. Every time I hear it, my heart beats faster. It reminds me of my mom’s voice and the bells on her keys that would ring every single time she comes home. God knows what she had done to me.”

“Everyone thinks I can drive but I just choose not to. The truth is, I never pass the test.”

“I fall in love too easily and terribly hard. I don’t know if that’s a good or bad thing.”

“I’m a perfectionist who isn’t perfect at all. It’s exhausting.”

“I contributed to my friends’ success and resent them for not including me once they became famous.”

“I was abused when I was 6 or 7. I can’t remember which age, but I remember what the abuser did. He drew naked figures, showed me where to touch, made me touch things… Things I don’t want to remember. I didn’t know it was wrong back then, but I’m grateful that it didn’t go any further. It left a big impact on me and I always blamed myself for it. I got OCD after that. My every action repeated, my daily routines repeated. I wash repeatedly, lock and unlock doors repeatedly, read my school books repeatedly. I repeat words 50 to 100 times till It satisfies me. It affected my life so much, and no one knew why. And no one knew why.”

“He is the love of my life but I found that out too late. Whenever there is snow, it reminds me of him.”

“It’s been two and a half years but I still can’t tell those around me that I am HIV positive. So instead of focusing on what I can’t do, I volunteer to help change the stigma around HIV.”

“One day, I came home from the university and my mother told me to cover up my legs in front of my friends. She didn’t want them to realize I had gained weight and she said she was just protecting me from gossip. The comment didn’t leave my mind and I’ve been bulimic ever since.”

“Many years ago, I was so broke that I stole a roll of toilet paper from my office.”

“I made up an entire part of my life. People believe some of the things actually happened, but really a lot of my stories are fake.”

“It sucks to feel unimportant. I know you shouldn’t really expect much from people but it hurts to see when they only come to you when they need something. They only remember me, not because of me, but for something they might gain.”

“I am generally thankful and happy about what I’ve got in my life. But I always feel like there is a black hole in my heart that no one would understand, some pain just won’t go away and I’m trying hard to live with it.”

“I haven’t been posting any photo with my face on it since last year. I feel better than ever.”

“I am constantly thinking about what other people think of me. And I don’t think that’s healthy.”

“Father’s day will always be the time of the year I’ll envy everybody for posting how great their dads are. I used to be sad about it but now, I think I accepted that he won’t be that hero and role model every father should be.”

“I buy stuff I can’t afford to make people believe I am someone who I am not. They see Prada and Burberry while my bank account is on the verge of ruining my life.”

“I’m in the military so I can’t be open about my suicidal thoughts. They constantly give you training on suicide prevention but they don’t get that once you make the decision to take your life nothing changes that decision unless you have true hope, and that’s my husband for me. I don’t think very many people out there have true hope.”

“I wanted to visit my grandmother in the hospital but it was a long walk and I got lazy. The next day, she passed away.”

“I am a journalist secretly dating a high-profile and controversial public official. If this gets out, I’m almost certain I’ll lose my job.”

“I dont have a twitter account but I still stalk him on twitter just to check how he’s doing. He seems to be doing fine. I’m not…”

“My father usually takes my milk after coming home drunk and suffering from stomach pain. One night, I said no to him to punish him for his drinking. A week later, he had a fatal accident after another drink. I really feel sorry for not offering my dad the milk that night.”

“I try my hardest to make people happy because I know what it’s like to feel absolutely worthless. I don’t want anyone else to feel like that.”

“Although the nasty rumors that circulated about me were untrue, I don’t bother correcting them and let people think I’m not a virgin anymore. But the truth is, I haven’t even had my first kiss.”

“I don’t know what I want…”

“I’m on the album cover of my cheating, lying, sociopathic ex-boyfriend. I’m still wondering if I should be ashamed or proud.”

“I like to think the best of people but I actually think most humans are terrible.”

“I’ve posted photos and stories on social media to show people how interesting and colorful my life is. However, it’s just the total opposite.”

“I tell people my mom died from cancer when she actually died from cirrhosis due to alcoholism. I didn’t want people to think she was a horrible mother. We were close no matter how different the alcohol made her sometimes.”

“I’m always the one who gets left in a relationship. I thought I was okay. I try to convince myself that I am okay. But there are nights when I just have sudden breakdowns and I ask myself so many questions. Is something wrong with me… am I really not worth fighting for?”

“I overdo things and I constantly make myself the center of attention because I’m terrified of being forgotten.”

“I lost my smile a long time ago. Now I go everywhere hoping nobody will notice that this isn’t my smile anymore.”

“I was born into a culture that never accepted me. Born to an Arab father and a European mother; I am constantly fighting two sides of my identity. Anxiety and depression has completely taken over me.”

“I tell my close friends a lot of details about my relationship issues. I can never tell if they actually do care, or if they’re just pretending.”

“Sometimes I feel like I am a really abusive person that only use people for my own good. This scares me so much.”

“I think I’ll never find my other half because I have a hard time expressing and feeling love; it might sound weird but I would only feel love after watching films and series because of the beauty they hold.”

“Five years ago, I caught my third girlfriend cheating on me. That was the time I decided to have a boyfriend instead.”

“I got drugged and raped by someone i knew and can’t get myself to tell anyone for fear of victim blaming. But on most days, i can’t help but victim blame myself.”

“It’s been two years but I still think about my ex every day. It’s cliche and lame I know. I wish I had a better secret.”

“I am in love with my favorite singer that lives halfway across the world. I often write her letters and I’m hoping we can be friends one day.”

“My first relationship was a physically and emotionally abusive one. When that finally ended, it took me a while to get used to the idea that love can actually be expressed in ways other than what I have experienced.”

“I talk to myself everyday in the mirror to rehearse how my day would likely turn out. Unfortunately, it never turns out the way I planned.”

“I never learned how to swim. So I just tell people that I have chlorine allergy. It’s quite embarrassing.”

“To this day, only my boyfriend and I know that I was pregnant at age 18. Not even my poem on a bathroom door was interpreted correctly by strangers. The secret continues to be safe between us and the hotel room where it ended.”

“I’m so self-conscious that I can’t even go to the grocery without comparing myself to other women there.”

“My bipolar disorder is completely out of control. No one knows, because I’m good at being fine.”

“I got rejected by my friends because they think I’m gay. I tried telling them that I’m not but I’m starting to realize they might be right. I’m lost between myself and our friendship.”

“I’m ashamed that I take pleasure in my friends fighting with their partners. It makes me feel better about being perpetually single.”

“I’m ten years older than my sister but she’s marrying someone my age. I tell people I’m unhappy about the age difference, but I think the real reason is I might be jealous.”

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